manna from heaven

A few weeks ago I went with my MOPS group to the pumpkin patch.  There were apples for tasting, pumpkins for picking, sheep for petting and the day was bathed in that glorious fall sunshine.  I noticed a sign posted near the petting zoo that had random facts about sheep;  it literally stopped me in my tracks. 

"If a sheep falls onto it's back, it cannot get back on it's feet without help."

The more I learn about sheep, the more obvious it becomes to me why Christ was constantly comparing us to them!  We need each other.  Period.  We were created for relationship- with God, with each other...relationship.

I have missed my comfortable, known relationships and have been slowly building new ones.  It's awkward and uncomfortable and strange.  Thankfully, my feet feel a bit more grounded since they have found a place to call home, but I still feel like I'm stumbling around unknown territory.   Last week I was feeling especially discouraged in this arena.  And I wallowed a bit.  (Do I really need to confess to that?)  And God was pretty direct with me, which is not our normal dynamic.  Usually He is very gentle, but I think He knew I needed a kick.

He kicked me when I was reading in Exodus.  The children of Israel have just been delivered from Egypt, something they prayed for, dreamed of, were anticipating with great joy.  God brought them out with amazing flourishes of His majesty:  the plagues in Egypt, the parting of the Red Sea...is there anything that could top the parting of the Red Sea?  They actually got to hear His voice and watch Him display His glory at Mt. Sinai.  But still...they are disappointed that He didn't take them to the Promised Land the way they had expected Him to. It was taking too long.  I can relate.

And as I was relating (and possibley even wallowing), I felt God asking me to name ways He has provided for me.  And be specific, please.

"You brought a job for my husband when he wasn't even looking, but we really needed some help.  And not just "a job", but a job he loves and comes home happy from with plenty of energy left to love on both me and Annie."
manna from heaven     

"You provided a home for us to live in rent free with friendly, albeit old-people, neighbors until we found a place to really call home."
manna from heaven

"Our house sold very, very quickly when even our realtor told us not to expect much."
manna from heaven


"I get to stay home and be a mommy, something I have wanted to do since I was five years old.  And it is everything I dreamed of and much, much more."
manna from heaven

"I have walks on Wednesday with girls I am starting to think of as friends, who I love and whose children I love and I look forward to Wednesdays and the conversations and the company."
manna from heaven

"A beautiful home, in the neighborhood I wanted, within walking distance of the library, grocery store and Starbucks!"
manna from heaven

The list continued and continued until I was in tears of gratitude to El Roi- the God who sees me.  He asked me to be specific because He has been specific in providing for me. 

"Praise the Lord, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise His holy name.
Praise the Lord, O my soul,
and forget not His benefits-
who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,
who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's."
(Psalm 103:1-5)

"Forget not His benefits."  Recognize them, celebrate them, dance with joy about them.  I want to cultivate a spirit of thanksgiving so that His praise is ever ready on my tongue, because He has been so good to me.  Not like I expected, not like I had planned, but He is bringing me back to my feet and surrounding me with exactly what I need.  And for that, I am very grateful.